My time as an au pair was generally positive. My host family was nice and seemed to be very accepting. They were joyful, relatively open minded people who accepted me into their house and made me feel welcome and at home.
One highlight of my experience was my host brother. He was 5 years old and a blast to be around. He was funny and energetic and had a full happy spirit. He is a great kid. His English still needs work, and I think I helped him a little. He was a little stubborn when it came to learning English, though.
My host family was also a highlight. They were so generous to me and always made sure I had everything I needed. They brought me with them on an overnight trip to a beach, and they brought me to Hong Kong to eat at a famous restaurant. They also bought me countless meals. I am so thankful to them for being so accommodating and amazingly friendly to me.
The only small problem with my host family stemmed from me not knowing if I was doing a good job; my host family was not always very communicative. I did ask them on different occasions if I was doing ok, and they told me yes and that they would tell me directly if something was wrong.
Still in some moments I felt like the family was unhappy with me, and I could understand some of the Chinese they were saying and it seemed like sometimes they were talking about me, but not including me in the conversation. Although personally, I also could have been more proactive in finding out if something was wrong as well.
The Lopair orientation in Hangzhou was only a little helpful for me because my host family did not follow the lopair guidelines very strictly, and many of the issues mentioned never came up during my stay. I did enjoy the sightseeing aspect though. Joey is very friendly. Also it is worth mentioning that in Futian district in Shenzhen you cannot use your metro card to rent a bike, which I was told at the orientation.
My Chinese Teacher Rena was very nice. She helped us get around Shenzhen and find things to do. I wish there was a more official guide to being a foreigner in Shenzhen though. Me and the other au pairs had to find most things ourselves using websites like shenzhenparty and meetup.com. I think instead of having to ask old au pairs and finding things out ourselves, there should already be a list of fun things to do on the Lopair site. Like how to rent bikes for example, or when/where foreigner meet ups happen. And the best parks, hikes, and bars etc.
There was not frequent checking in from Lopair staff, which was not a problem for me, but it could have for others who were struggling more. Shenzhen only had 2 other au pairs, and I feel like because of that it was lonely sometimes. Having the other au pairs from Guangzhou come for culture class was not a good experience though. They really wanted their long trip to be "worth it" and were let down because they did not have a good time. They thought we were being rude, but in reality we were just tired and did not have much in common with them.
I do like how it feels like a family here. Me and the two other au pairs and Rena had a special bond and it was nice. Being friends with them was a highlight of my experience.
One other challenge of my experience was my 12 year old host sister. She would never speak to me in English and only in Chinese, even though her English was pretty good when she did speak. I found it a little rude when she would always say "你猜啊” when I did not understand her. But she is a 12 year old girl so this is probably just normal behavior for that age. Overall this was not a big problem, but a small one that was sometimes a little frustrating.
All in all it was a good time here in SZ and I feel like I have grown into a more independent person. I feel more confident being thrown into a completely new situation than I did before I came here, and I have learned about myself and China tremendously. I have also met some really cool people and hopefully also made some life-long friends.
Response from LoPair Culture Exchange
We are sorry to hear that. Since the first days in China, with the Orientation Arrival, we help our Au Pairs develop awareness about Chinese families' different mindset and about what to expect from living with a host family in China. However, we do appreciate the flexible perspective you adopted and thanks for highlighting your achievements. All the best with future experiences!